Hi friends!
You've read our last blog
about self-care tips.
You’re already doing a lot of enriching well-being strategies.
As a result, you’ve noticed that you’ve been feeling pretty good within.
And now, you’re ready to make friends but aren't sure how…
Well, you've come back to the right place!
Today, we’re going to answer this question together: How do you make a friend?
And I don't mean make a friend like how Bonnie made Forkie out of glue, googly eyes, and popsicle sticks in Toy Story 4! I mean, how do you build new friendships with real people, in real life?
As we continue our theme, Student Mental Health Week, we’ll discuss tips on making friends in real life – whether you're living abroad and navigating a new country, or you’re in your home country trying to broaden your horizons.
Source: Pixabay
Friends in Real Life vs Friends Online
First, let's understand the importance of making friends in real life, and let's be doubly clear that you can build very meaningful friendships with friends online too! There is no question that online friendships can be just as meaningful as friendships that are in person. And guess what?! The concept of having a friend you’ve never met in person is not new. Before the internet, some people had pen pals which were long-distance friendships based on writing letters to one another. Online friends are similar.
But the idea today is to focus on the importance of also having friends with whom you can socialize in person and be outdoors.
It's not a secret that humans are social creatures. We thrive in communities and learn social skills because we are in relationships with others - parents, siblings, relatives, neighbors, etc. When we are socializing in person, more of our senses are engaged.
Sometimes simply sitting in the presence of a friend, receiving a hug, or laughing next to someone can recharge one’s energies in a way that nothing else can.
So how do we make new friends?
Source: Pixabay
1. Go Outside
I know, I know... sounds simple, right? But believe it or not, in our modern era of high technology and excessive screen time, it's becoming more and more difficult for some of us to actually step outside and make friends in the real world.
If you're ready to go outside, but not sure what to do; join volunteer groups, take up a group sport, or attend conferences on a subject you like or are curious about. You'd be surprised how chatty people are when you're doing the same thing they also enjoy!
2. Speak First
Ok, so you've made it
outside. Bravo! Now, the next step is speaking to someone! Sometimes it can
take guts to muster up the courage to take the first step, but do it. Say Hi.
The more you do it, the easier it becomes.
Give it a try at the next campus-wide event or at that international language exchange meetup group you keep thinking about attending. These are often events filled with newcomers just like you who are looking for friends. Once there, get chatting with a few people and then invite them to join you in another event or outing. Think about somewhere in your host country you've been wanting to visit. Invite the person along.
Even if the person says no, that's ok! It's not personal. Who knows, they may have a lot on their plate already. The point is, keep going and ask others! You can try a new person another day somewhere else. Think about it this way: someone may be looking for a friend just like you, so stay the course. ;)
Source: Pexels
3. They Said Yes!
Yahoo! You did it! They said yes and want to hang out with you again. Well done. But what do you do now?
Have a plan! When you meet someone, have a simple plan to suggest like going to a museum or movie or engaging in an activity that requires talking. You could even just go for a walk and do a walk & talk. Truly, keeping it simple takes the pressure off of you and your potential new friend. :)
4. Widen Your Lens
Maybe you have friends, but you're looking to broaden your scope and meet some folks who have different interests. Turn your curiosity switch ON and allow yourself to discover something new.
What would you like to learn
more about? Once you have a few ideas, find a local group or organization that
focuses on it and attend meetings. What better way to meet new friends than by
asking questions of those who are often enthusiastic to have newcomers share
their passion?
Source: Pexels
5. Go Play
Yep! That’s it. Just go play. Remember the fun you had as a child when you played? Friendships easily built simply because you went to play? Well, that’s the same idea here! Don’t let your age stop you from going outside to play!
Whether it’s board games, chess, cards, or making up your own game; these are great ways to get to know new people that could develop into friendships. Let your natural fountain of joy bubble up again, reignite your imagination and unleash your laughter all by just playing fun games with others.
Source: Pixabay
6. Would You Be Friends With You?
At first glance, that question may seem odd. But, it’s not as weird as it sounds. Take a moment and ask yourself, would you be friends with you? :)
As you embark on your new friend-making journey, take a moment to do some self-reflection. Are you the kind of person you would want to befriend? Do you keep your word more often than not when making plans to hang out? Are you on time or late? Do you listen to others when they’re speaking? Do you share your thoughts?
Are you a good friend to yourself? Yes! That’s an important one too! The idea here is: If you’re a good and considerate person to yourself, you will likely have the skills to be that for someone else and (very importantly!) know what to expect in return. Good friendships leave both sides feeling happy, comfortable, at ease, and fulfilled.
OVER TO YOU: ARE YOU READY TO GO MAKE SOME FRIENDS?
Now it’s your turn to share your friend-making highs and lows. What’s worked for you and what hasn’t on your friend-making journey? How do you make new friends?
How are you a good friend to yourself and to others?
Which of the six tips have you tried or would like to?
And if you haven't been successful at making friends, let us know so we can help you! Click Reply below.
Source: Pixabay
Here’s to making good friends!
Iya, OLS Community Manager - English